16 Nov The Joy of Missing Out (JOMO)
OMO: /ˈjōmō/ (Noun) Joy of missing out. Feeling content with staying in and disconnecting as a form of self-care.
Antonym: Fear of missing out (FOMO)
My email inbox is full of invitations for holiday get-togethers, school parties and performances, must-try baking recipes, and local holiday-themed activities around the city. When I open our mailbox, I find offerings for companies that will cover our house in lights and inflatable decorations, others who will make charcuterie boards for holiday parties, and clothing and electronics stores teasing their Black Friday deals. Store window displays remind me that I should rush in to find a new picture-perfect holiday outfit. Even the very coffee shop I am sitting in as I write has a sign next to colorful coffee tumblers and a tower of holiday-themed gift cards reading “Matching mugs make the holidays more festive! Buy matching ones for your family today!”
There’s a loud voice in the back of my head that’s urging me to spend this holiday time maximizing every moment by filling the calendar with performances and light displays and parties. The voice reminds me that it’s time to decorate the house, schedule photo sessions, send cards and bake towers of tasty treats. It chatters away, reminding me of what I might miss out on if I don’t fill every minute.
“Look at all of the holiday fun out there,” the voice noisily reminds me. “You should do it all to make the most of this season!”
When I listen closely, though, there’s a quieter voice. It’s a deeper wisdom that gently whispers the joy of missing out. It reminds me that what I do with this season and how busy I feel throughout these days is up to me. It’s the emotionally intelligent response that allows me to relish in the contentment of doing what I actually want to do.
The joy of missing out is a rather unusual form of joy because it involves positive feelings due to the absence of an event or experience rather than the presence of a positive event. It’s a deliberate choice to step away from the chaos of the holidays and rediscover the magic of missing out.
Here are five things I’m doing to slow down and focus on what matters most to me as this holiday season begins:
1. Saying no to some holiday party invitations and prioritizing quality time with my family instead.
2. Letting go of the stress of baking countless holiday treats and instead making a few cherished family recipes that we can enjoy together.
3. Saying goodbye to the pressure of a perfectly coordinated family photo for holiday cards and using a candid and authentic shot instead.
4. Abandoning the response of running out to match every gift received with an equally grand gesture and instead cherishing the thought behind each present.
5. Skipping the urge to feel like our family needs to participate in every holiday-themed activity in the city and enjoying the simplicity of quality time together instead.
After all, missing out on the things that don’t matter to us is the only way to make space for the things that do.
What unnecessary things might you let go of this holiday season?