24 Jul Where Empathy Begins
The other day, Emma looked at me and asked, “Are you wearing smaller earrings, or are your ears getting bigger?” I laughed and hurried to the mirror. I was sure it wasn’t the earrings, since they were my usual pair, but I still found myself tilting my head and feeling a bit self-conscious about the size of my ears. Ugh, giant ears, I thought. Just one more thing to add to the list of getting older: ears that never stop growing, thanks to gravity and cartilage.
Maybe it’s just biology. Or maybe there’s something more to it. Perhaps it’s a quiet kind of life wisdom—a gentle reminder to listen a little more, to keep expanding the space we make for voices and perspectives beyond our own.
Some days, my ears might look big, but they don’t always feel big enough, especially when I’m sure I’m right and someone else is clearly wrong. In those moments, my listening shrinks. I hold my opinions tighter. The world feels smaller.
When my ears don’t feel big enough, I remind myself to be deliberately curious. I reach for curiosity on purpose, pausing to ask myself, “I wonder why?” That small, intentional question can make space where there wasn’t any before—for their feelings, or for my own.
Curiosity lets in light. Openness lays down a welcome mat, inviting us out of our separate corners.
That’s where empathy begins. Even when it’s hard. Especially then.
It’s hard to change someone’s mind if mine is closed. But when I soften, when I make a bit more space inside myself, the distance between us shrinks.
Maybe this is why our ears keep growing, quietly urging us to listen longer, stretch further, and let understanding grow alongside us.
So if my ears are getting a little bigger, maybe that’s not such a bad thing. I think I’ll keep trying to grow my ears just a bit more, and make more space for empathy to find its way in.